Glomp the Womp

Hola! The following story was written in the chatbox after:

[21:12:50 25/02/13] * Firework resists glomping the womp.
[21:12:55 25/02/13] @ 1ncnspcuous : .
[21:13:19 25/02/13] * Womp-rat appreciates the non-glomping.

For the full chat archive, PM me and I'll send it your way. For now, here is the filtered version, enjoy~

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There's a sport in a place, a place far away, a place where little critters are used for fun and play

The sport is played by adults and children of all ages. It was played in the past, by squires and pages

It's a sport of endurance, agility and cunning. And, of course, lots of diving and running

Glomp the Womp is the game which I speak. But it's a special game that can only be played once a week

First find a Womp, but not any will do. It has to be two meters long, but less heavy than you

Next you need to find a big, wide, open space, for the game of glomping is akin to a race

Now find some friends, limit it to three, four or five. Too many friends and the womp may not survive

Spread out evenly, and tie your running shoes, for the very next step sets the Womp on the loose

There's a short count down, three, two one, then begin! The players take off and the Womp gives them a grin

For you see, its truly the Womp that will win

The womp is fast, agile and slick. It can evade every tackle, and will never trip

Its fuzzy and cute, and won't give any harm, but it's not uncommon for a player injure their arms.

Diving and tackling and sliding is fun, but when a half dozen players are out on the run

All trying to trap the Womp in their midst, its obvious what happens when several dives miss

Headbutts and tackles intended for the Womp instead meet other players. The lucky ones land on their rump

The Womp, meanwhile, has jumped away. He could easily escape but always decides to stay

For the game is quite fun and gives her much joy. The game is actually a clever little ploy

For in the wild no creature will bother the Womp. Not the foxes, the hounds, or the ten foot Bar-Glumps

Only by getting 'caught' in the tiny player cage allows the Womp to have fun for a day

She'll zig and she'll zag, and she'll jump and she'll squeek, then her tail she will wag and be filled with joy for the week

The players will give chase, even if they may bleed, since injuries are temporary but some will take heed

For the experts know that the Womp won't be caught. Not by tackling and sliding, but by careful thought

Its the Womp that decides who's the victor of the lot

They never get caught by the strongest or fastest. They don't even allow the young children free passes

The womp will choose the one who's heart is the purest. Its the kind and friendly one's who win surest

So you big brawny bullies or smarmy 'smart' dames, had better re-consider playing this game

Its the ones you neglect, the one's who don't balk, the one's who sit in the corner and talk

Talk of times of fun and friendships desired, talk of lost loves with joy, and don't need drugs to get wired

Its them, yes them! who will be picked by the Womp. They'll be picked for a big, warm, furry glomp

To Glomp the Womp is not a game of skill. Its not a game of sport, honor or thrill

So next time you join other players in this, remember what I said and you may notice

The more fun you have, the less you care about winning, the easier the task and the less you'll be spinning

For the Womp will feel your desire to play, and won't string you along for the rest of the day.

It's still adorable and I am honoured to be abused by you guys ^^