Hello everyone. I want to take a moment to speak my mind. Not as an admin, but just as another member. A friend. Someone who just wants to get along. Allow me to tell a story.
My first time I came to this site, I was alone. It was mere chance and impulse that I clicked on the link and thought of RPing again. After doing my darndest to have fun and try to improve the experience here, I was given an admin role and did what I could to improve things as the forum grew. I picked out members that I trusted to help me in that and things were going strong. We had a golden age and we all were having a good time. That is, afterall, what this whole place is about. We are all here to have a good time and RP.
We fell on hard times when one of our own moderators was confronted about his very aggressive behavior toward the other members. The entire staff was in favor of doing something about it. Several examples of members being victimized were brought forth. None were really deniable, but our moderator fought on his ground nonetheless.
Everything was put on the line when this moderator was determined to go down in flames. When it was all said an done, they were demoted and left of their own accord. But the damage was done. Half the staff lost taste for RPing, myself included, and then the worst of times began.
Eventually it came down to myself and 1nc running the forum. I myself was pratically doing nothing for the site, sometimes talking with 1nc to approve a few apps and keep the site from fully collapsing. Members kept pouring in, and after enough time, I recovered and persevered. New staff were eventually found and hired, and things were going good.
Things haven't been the same since that one incident, but there sure was a lot of good times had still. What is going on here can be related to that. There is no real way to ever win in the end. The energy is spent, emotions fly, and everyone feels upset and ruined. I myself almost left as others have.
But as much as i felt like doing that. As much as it would have been easy to just leave, I didn't. If I left, others would suffer. I wasn't the kind of person to leave when I knew things would likely fall apart. That others would lose hope and then the place that was once happy and fun became a mess of drama and depression. I stayed, even if it was a weak presence at best.
Eventually the community grew and I, no we, helped bring it together. It became a happy place again. And I think i can confidently say that me choosing to stay when times go rough made this possible.
Everyone here is hurt. Right now when you log in you probably don't feel the same way you did a week ago. I feel that too. I feel like I can't RP or post so well. But no matter how you feel, it gets better. The power to make this place happy again rests no where else but in you. It may be rough and slow on the recovery for some, but ultimately we have to grow to realize that sometimes we get lemons, and we have to grow and make the best of what we can, rather than let the situation itself define who we are.
If you wish to leave the forum, that is your choice to make. But if you stay, you can bring this place back to what you want it to be. Emotions are temporary. Actions are permanent. Whatever you chose to do, I have nothing against you or anyone else.
I love you guys. Through good times and bad. No matter how bad it gets. I forgive you. All of you. I would love to have you here.
Subject: In which my feelings are admitted 
Wed Jul 24, 2013 4:53 pm
