Interesting Impossibilities.

Shala moved her head to look into Intel's eyes. She did not look very happy. She appeared rather 'upset'.

"Hey, Smarty Pants McFly! In-case you forgot, you started a magic fire and are going to burn down the town at this rate!" She gave him a light smack across the cheek. "Marvel at it later. I don't want to have to clean up this mess."

Shala looked to the blurry mess and burning clouds. Sighing, she rolled her eyes. "I'm seriously going to regret this...." She said before galloping off toward the fires.

((Sorry! had cables stolen here. Just got online today. No more use of a smart phone for posts. YAY!))

Golden was still panicking. Prancing from one hoof to the other. Mumbling things under his breath. Suddenly the unicorn mare started to gallop towards the fire. Golden couldn't understand why she would want to run to something that set clouds on fire, but she might need some help. So he quickly flew so that he was just above her as they headed towards the fire.

"You going to need some help?"

Asked Golden, his voice sounding unsure.

Quill was still in shock over this fire. He knew that they had to do something, but he didn't know what. He saw Shala run towords the fire, followed closely by Bolt. He turned to see Intel scribbling down notes furiously.

"Hey!" Quill shouted at Intel, "in case you didn't notice, the fire's spreading! We need to put it out, not just sit there and take notes on it!" Quill suddenly had an idea, "can you use your magic to controll it?" He asked Intel.

Intel was brought out of his reverie, "Stop calling me that!" he shouted to a retreating Shala. He paused. "And don't run towards the fire, you dolts! Who knows what would happen!" Another pause, "Thought it would- no, they might get hurt!"

He then turned to Quill, flipping through his notes to his earlier experiments. "Magic won't work, I'm afraid," he said, "It will just convert any spell to fuel. It will do the same with water, earth material etc. I can draw magic out of the flames, but when I tried that..." he glanced at his notes, "...the objects in question desintergrated. The way they are now, they don't seem to be burning down, but doing such a thing will cause the same general thing. It didn't spread like this before though." He frowned. "Definitely a pegasus thing." His eyes alighted with an idea. "Hey, can't you pegasi change lightning clouds into normal clouds naturally? It probably won't stop the burning, but I think it might stop the spreading. And to stop the burning...." His mouth turned into a smirk. "I'm going to need earth ponies."

It was such a simple idea, he thought, I can't believe I didn't-

"I need to stop Shala killing herself first," he realised, with horror. He ran after her. "Shala! Stop! This is something unicorns can't handle! Probably! I'm not quite sure!"

Shala did not entirely hear Intel and kept on running forward, stopping a few feet short of the flames. She kicked at the ground to try and see if it would smother the flames but they only fed on the dirt. Unfortunately, the flames, being magical and not of the same nature as fire, caught onto her hind hoof.

The pain was immediate and she yelled out before running like crazy back from where she came, spreading the fire as she went. With her hoof on fire and slowly spreading, things only began to hurt more. Her response was rather predictable.

"FIRE! MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP!!!" She ran about unpredictably.

"FIRE! MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP MAKE IT STOP!!!"

"Oh Celestia, oh Celestia, oh Celestia!"

Chanted Golden, as he flew around maddly looking for any water sorce he could find, but the land suddenly seemed as dry as the desert. Golden had no idea which way to go and was becoming more and more perturbed as Shala screamed louder and louder. In a panic he grabbed a near by cloud. It wasn't a rain cloud and Golden couldn't find any water to fill it with. He just hoped that there was enough water inside to put Shala out. At least the cloud had yet to be caught on fire. Golden held it over Shala and kicked it, hoping that rain would put Shala out. But everytime he kicked the cloud to start any rain falling. Shala had run from underneath it missing any of the rain.

"STAND STILL! For the love of Celestia!"

Shouted Golden, his hoofs shaking as the cloud got smaller and smaller.

Quill saw Shala running around on fire. He also saw Bolt trying to make his cloud rain on her.

"STAY STILL! For the love of Celestia!" Bolt shouted.

"This is probably going to hurt." Quill said to himself as he flew to Shala, and tackled her to the ground. "NOW BOLT!" He shouted up.at the cloud.

It was at this point that Intel realised he was surrounded by idiots, or ponies that wouldn't listen to him. The difference depended on the situation, and in this scenario, it could be said that there was none.

"No, you foals!" he screamed, "Water would only make it even worse! That's why the clouds caught on fire!" Even now, the puddles that were formed by Golden's attempts at putting Shala out had turned into pits of black and white flame.

Stupid pegasi. Stupid Shala. "IT'S NOT LIKE NORMAL FIRE!"

Stupid, stupid Intel.

Didn't you realise? Didn't you see? Can't you feel? A fire would mean it would be too hot to come this close to this place. A fire would mean it would be emitting smoke, alerting the town. It doesn't even have the same colour as fire!

It's not like normal fire. Why are you treating it like fire?

Because like fire it spreads and consumes?

Does it consume?

Intel looked around. Like before, despite the magical effect, there was no sign of degrading on any of the affected objects.

Come on, Intel think back. What caused this all to happen?

"The dampener..." he croaked.

And? And....?

A spell being transfigured within an uncertain substance? What does that mean? What were you blathering about before, you idiot? You released the jam from its reality anchor! And remember the first rule of uncertainty. Everything wants to be something! Everything wants to be in a certain state! Remove something completely, and it will try to be anything! Even something else!

Intel's eyes went to the site where the small dampener once lay, now completely gone.

"Nothing wants to be uncertain..." he muttered to himself. Then, an idea struck him.

So did a bolt of magical false fire, setting his tail 'alight'.

"NOW BOLT!"

With shaking hoofs Golden hauled the last small remnants of cloud over Quill and Shalla. The cloud being big enough just to cover his body.

"Oh please Celestia, let there be enough water in the cloud. Please, please, please."

Prayed Golden as quickly flew away, turning sharply back towards the cloud and speeding towards it as fast as he could go. He held his hoofs out in front of him and braced. There was a small 'wump' as he hit the cloud, went straight through it and popped out the other side. For a moment the cloud just dissapeared and what looked like a small rainbow of droplets hung in mid air, before it all fell towards Shalla and Quill. The water cascaded down upon the ponies. Covering them briefly in a wall of water, obscuring the view of all ponies looking towards them.

"IT'S NOT LIKE NORMAL FIRE!"

"You don't say?! Just do something about it!"

Shouted Golden as he tried to see whether Quill and Shalla were ok or not.

Shala's screaming increased as she was pinned down in place. "GET OFF ME YOU PONYTARDS! I'M ON FIRE I SWEAR I WILL GUT YOU ALL LIKE MONKEYS OUT OF A FRUITGRINDER!" Her swearing went on for some time until the water was rained on her.

The result was horrifying. The water acted like fuel and only cause her to almost be entirely engulfed in flames. To repeat the terrible sounds and swears that came from her would be damming. Every bit of breath her lungs could take was put into it.

Shala could not even think. The pain was all over. She wasn't sure if it was instinctual reaction or some hidden line of thought in her head that did the next part, but it hurt almost as much as the fire.

In a quick flash of light, Shala was gone. Any pony with a quick eye would see a blur go from where she was and retrace where she was from running around on fire before it stopped right next to Intel.

"-Well I guess you got some fun times ahead of you then." She said before slapping Intel on the shoulder. "Now, before you panic, do you want to.....Uhhh..." Shala looked about, somewhat confused. To everypony looking, Shala appeared to be fine. Just as she was before any of this happen.

"Ugh..." Waves of nausea and pain hit her in the head. "Intel, what in the world did you....Are you on fire?" She said, pointing a hoof at his tail.

Quill ignored the stream of curses coming from Shala, as he waited for Bolt to act. As soon as the first drop of water hit the unatural flames, they flared up and caught everything on fire, including Quill.

"AGGGHHHHHHHHH!" Quill shouted at the top of his lungs, the pain was intense, but he wasn't burning up. Then Shala disapeared from under him, and reappeared beside Intel. "FOR THE LOVE OF CELESTIA SOMEPONY PUT ME OUT!" Quill screamed.

Intel blinked. So many things were wrong here. How did Shala? Did the false flame cause a rupture in space-time when mixed with Shala's affinity towards time?

Bolt, the fool, had completely ignored Intel's warning and now Quill was affected and coated with false flame.

Oh, and so was his tail. Somehow, in the light of things, it didn't matter one bit. The pain he felt was simply a distraction. There was a problem, and it needed a solution.

"No, it's not on fire," Intel said, gritting his teeth against the pain of extreme...heat? He had read once before that ponies couldn't distinguish between extreme heat or extreme cold, only registering it as extreme pain. "It's not the right colour, and my tail is not burning down. Don't you dare put water on it either. In fact, it needs to be set on fire. Non-magically."

It seemed insane. In many cases, it violated common sense. But common sense was akin to nonsense, especially when it came to magic.

"Actual fire and this magic fire would cancel each other out." That was a complete and utter lie, probably, but his real reasoning was more complex and went beyond the realms of nonsense to the frontiers of incomprehensible blaughuable.

"Hey, pegasus boy! Make yourself useful and get help! Sparkle would be nice, but anypony who can light a non-magical fire would be even better!" Intel yelled at Bolt above. As he was shouting, he was also trying to keep his tail as far away from his body as possible.

Shouting also stopped him from his powerful urge to bombard Shala with questions on how exactly she did her disappearing teleportation/fire cancel/ amnesia/timescrewery trick. He had to try and find a way to light Quill on fire without direct magic.

Well, this should be easy.

"Hey, pegasus boy! Make yourself useful and get help! Sparkle would be nice, but anypony who can light a non-magical fire would be even better!"

"Who the hay is Sparkle?!"

Shouted Golden, his mind twitching back and forth between Shala literally walking back in time and Quill after a daring feat of heroism, had now managed to set him-self on fire as well. It seemed by luck, or by Celestia's intervention that Golden had not yet been caught by the black and white blaze.

"Never mind! I just hope a unicorn will do!"

With that Golden quickly sped of to town in search of any unicorns bright red unicorns, or any coloured unicorns for that matter.

*Shunk* Would be the next sound Intel heard, followed by a feeling of absence where his tail was. Shala moved her floating axe away as the flaming tail mane fell to the ground, leaving Intel with a short stubby cut tail mane.

"Fixed it." She said casually and looked at the pony fully engulfed in flames. A quick look to her axe, and then back to the pony made her think before she shrugged. "Don't think I can help him...Maybe we can get some sticks and use your tail mane as kindling to start a fire.....Is that going to kill him? Because he sounds like he might die or something."

"I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO, JUST STOP THE BURNING!" Quill had never expirenced this kind of pain before. Other pains would eventualy go away, but Quill wasn't certain wether or not this sensation would ever stop. His entire body was tense, waiting for some kind of release from the pain.

Intel blinked. "Where did you pull that one from?" he asked incredulously motioning to the axe, "And no, not directly. There's going to be some trauma, yes. Untamed magic tends to do that. Um, do you know how to light a fire without magic, though?" He looked around for some branches that were not affected by the false flames. There weren't many, and he had to act fast to gather them.

"Who the hay is Sparkle?"

Mumbled Golden as he flew into Ponyville, he knew of one unicorn that might be able to help, she apparently was a student of Celestia her-self and she was always found in the library. Quickly Golden steered him-self towards the hollow tree that was the library. Soon he was on the ground and knocking on the door. But no one answered and the door was locked. Quickly Golden flew towards the center of Ponyville, looking for any unicorns he could find, but to his horror non were around.

"It had to be today. The one day we need a unicorn, they all just disappear!"

Golden turned back to the woods, when suddenly he had an idea. There were three clouds hanging over Ponyville. Luckily they were to far away to be caught by the magical fire. Quickly Golden flew over to the clouds and started to push them together. Suddenly what sounded like a 'pop' escaped from the clouds as they merged, turned darker and created a storm cloud. Clamping his hoofs down on the storm cloud he bulleted towards the magical fire, making sure to keep the storm cloud away from the clouds that had caught fire.

"I have an idea!" Shouted Golden as he neared the unicorns.

Shala demonstrated where the axe came from by putting it away in her mane. "Practice. Helps to tie off the end of your mane too. You should try it. I bet you would look great with a long mane."

She looked about, remembering that there was a pony burning and a terrible disaster going on. "Oh. Well I hope we can fix all the fire because i really don't want to have to move. I got all my alcohol at home and if that fire gets near it....Well lets not talk about that."

Bolt came in time to shout his revelation to them as Shala felt like Quill was pretty screwed. She tapped Intel and pointed to Bolt. "Hey, I think he has an idea."

Intel looked up at the naturally produced storm cloud. "Oh yeah," he said to himself, "That could work too."

Then he shouted, "Well, what are you waiting for? Do your thing!"

As if realising the threat, the magically induced falsefireclouds started moving by themselves around Bolt, as if preparing to strike.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Do your thing!"

"Oh buck..."

Cussed Golden while watching the black and white clouds of fire closing in on him. It was now or never. Quickly he aimed a shot at a nearing cloud. Punching the storm cloud with his fore-hoof, what sounded like glass being shattered echoed from the cloud while a golden bolt of lightning struck the black and white cloud. There was a small explosion around the cloud as two massive energies met. Then, as if the cloud had never been struck at all. It popped back into existence, small black and white sparks fizzing around the cloud. Golden started laughing.

"It worked! Oh Celestia! It worked! Hang on Quill! I'm coming buddy"

Spinning the cloud around, Golden punched his storm cloud at any remaining mono-clouds that closed in on him. Flashing light from the golden bolts of lightning and the sound of small explosions echoed off the trees of Whitetail wood. Soon the sky had been cleared of any offending clouds, but the ground, trees and animals, were still on fire. But most importantly Quill was still burning.

"I'm sorry Quill! I hope it doesn't hurt to much."

Bringing the storm cloud closer to the ground, Golden punched it again. Lightning struck Quill's tail and engulfed him in a small explosion of two energies neutralizing each other. Then just like that, the fire on Quill had been snuffed. Whether he was still breathing was another matter.

"Hey! You two, see if he's ok! If he is get him up here to help kill this fire!"

Shouted Golden to the unicorns, he hoped Quill was alright, but the fire was still spreading and he had to stop it from reaching Ponyville.

By this point, Quill had lost consciousness. The only reason he knew that he was still alive, was the ever present pain of the magical fire that refused to cease. Suddenly from a far away place, at least it was in Quill's mind, he heard a CRACK! and then felt searing heat, actual heat, not the magical variety all around him. An explosion ripped through his mind, and then everything was silent. The pain which had been plauging Quill for so long was gone.

"Am I dead?" Quill thought, "no I can't be dead!" He began to panic at the prospect of never waking up, but just as he gave up hope, light began to fill his mind. He opened his eyes, squinting at the brightness of the sun, and tried to stand, but his legs were too stiff to move properly. His throat was raw from the screaming. All Quill really wanted at the moment was a refreshing glass of water.

Shala watched with great interest, almost wishing she had some popcorn to munch on. This was just too good. You couldn't get this kind of entertainment anywhere but the movies. She watched as the lightening hit Quill and was blinded for a moment.

"This is the most messed up solution to something I have ever seen. And you are that much more awesome on my book, Intel."

"I've seen weirder," Intel replied, completely truthfully. He ran over to the fallen pegasus. Supporting him, a cursory examination said that Quill was probably not going to fly any time soon. But...

"My goddesses...you're alive," Intel breathed, "You're alive!"

He couldn't stop himself from laughing in relief and repeating that phrase over and over, increasing in volume each time.

"You're Alive! Haha, I can't believe it! YOU'RE ALIVE! ALIIIIIIIIVE!"

This was finally punctuated by a burst of fresh laughter, accompanied by a convenient lightning strike by Bolt's efforts to contain the magical flame, reflecting light off his glasses, obscuring his eyes.

"You're Alive! Haha, I can't believe it! YOU'RE ALIVE! ALIIIIIIIIVE!"

As Golden punched the storm cloud again, hitting a small tree, he turned to see if Quill was ok and managed to catch the flash from lightning bouncing off the unicorns glasses. He was suddenly filled with an image of how the unicorn had just sewn a body back together had now managed to get the corpse to start walking. He was also filled with an image of him-self being some sort of hunch-back foul looking pony who had just flipped a switch. Golden shook his mane out, throwing the images into a far away place in his mind.

"I gather Quill is alive then."

Mumbled Golden as he punched the cloud again, dousing a small bird of the mono-flame.

After a while the fire had been extinguished. Small sparkles of black and white flame could be seen drifting through the air, burning out before they reached the ground.

"Well, that was exciting."

Said Golden as he landed next to the group of ponies.

Quill laid there while Intel began shouting "YOU'RE ALIVE!" over and over again. His body felt sore all over, and he felt exausted despite just regaining conciousness.

"Yeah, I guess I am." Quill rasped, it hurt to even form a simple sentence, "Hey does any pony have something to drink? My throat is killing me." It felt like he would lose his voice soon, and he didn't doubt it. Screaming in pain for long periods of time generaly did that to one's voice. Quill could hear explosions in the distance, and uessed that whatever had put him out was working for the rest of the unnatural fire. Just then Bolt landed ammoung the ponies.

"Well that was exciting." he said. Quill just grunted, not trusting his mouth to form words.